I was looking in the mirror the other day and I realized something. I'm way too pretty to be spending what's left of my life working a full time job when instead, I could harness the power of the internet for completely greedy purposes.
I want people to send me a dollar. For the amount of change that you wouldn't even notice if it fell out of your pocket and rolled down into a drainage ditch where Pennywise would tempt you with balloons, you can provide an old man with the freedom to be a king. I know there's going to be questions on what I'm trying to accomplish here. I figured I'd use this site to kind of answer those.
How can I donate $1 to you?
Why do I want everyone to send me a dollar?
Well, that's easy. I want the freedom to do what I want without having to worry about the "man" getting all up in my business.
Why should everyone give me a dollar?
C'mon, I'm not unrealistic. I know not everyone will give me a dollar. But if like, half the world's adult population hooks a brotha up, that's like 2.5 billion dollars that I'll have. That's not unreasonable is it? I didn't think so.
What would I do with the money?
What wouldn't I do with the money? Maybe I'd spend it all on crack and hookers. Maybe I'd donate it to charity. Maybe I'd live like a king and buy a private island off the coast of Chad. I could buy a nice refurbished iPad that I could read comic books off of. That would be nice. My eyes are getting worse as I get older, and they weren't great to begin with. I could buy a year's supply of hot pockets and give them to the poor. Perhaps I'd become like Mr. Beast and pay for people to hear for the first time. That was a nice thing to do. I'd like to do something like that. Except, I wouldn't film it. I'd do it just to do it. Because I'm a nice guy too. Maybe I'd start a YouTube channel where I would travel the cities of the world and find the best public bathrooms that are a single person bathroom. Wouldn't you love to know where you could go for some privacy? I sure would. Maybe I'd stay home all day and watch Who's Line Is It Anyway clips on Facebook. I'd probably buy a bunch of vinyl records and become one of those guys. I don't know. The sky is really the limit here. It all depends on YOU!
What do you get out of giving me a dollar?
You'll get the satisfaction of knowing that you're part of something larger. Something life changing. You may not be able to change the world but you can change the world of one person. Wouldn't that be swell? Your name will also appear on the Super Heroes of Change List that will appear on this site. That's right. Everyone who donates $1 to the Project Give Me A Dollar gets their name listed on the Super Heroes of Change list. Think about what that means. If anyone ever calls you selfish, you can pull up the list and show them your name and say, "uh uh, I'm not selfish. See, I donated. I'm a giver." Wouldn't that be awesome you handsome devil?
Do I have to give my real name for the Super Heroes of Change List?
Of course not. I don't know your real name. It can be an online handle or a business name or whatever. Don't make it offensive though. I won't post that. I'll change it to an edited version of it. I appreciate your dollar but please don't be that guy (or gal, it's 2024 after all). Just add what name you want to be displayed in the note when you send that juicy juicy dollar over.
Can I give more than $1?
NO! This isn't the project give me two dollars. I'm not selfish. I want to make my fortune the old fashioned way. One dollar at a time from strangers on the internet.
What kind of millionaire (or billionaire) would I be?
I can't say for sure since I haven't ever been one, but I'd like to think that I'd use my vast wealth for good. I wouldn't be a super villain. At least I don't think so. I do think I'd be the coolest rich person in the world though. I'm already pretty cool. At least my mom said so!
Do I really think this idea will work?
Like Jesus said, you miss all the shots you don't take. I can't be sure that this stupid idea will work. However, I have seen much dumber things on the internet, so you never know.
If you have any questions, feel free to ask away. I'll update this list with new answers as they come up.
